I find myself profoundly depressed lately and this is my excuse for not posting here. In fact, the depression seems to leave me with such apathy and lethargy that I do very little indeed. Sad, since I'm normally a cheerful and productive sort. It all comes down to this damn UK visa. It's a house of cards. I need to get to the US to get my visa. To do this I need to get the money to buy plane tickets. To get money, I need to work, but I can't work unless I get the UK Visa so I can get married and get permission to settle. Oh yes, did I mention getting married? This is the really crazy bit, you have to either be a citizen here or have a special UK Visa for them to allow you to get married. In the US, you just go get married but not here, oh no , no, no.

I feel like I am living in a nursury rhyme -

For want of a nail the shoe was lost.
For want of a shoe the horse was lost.
For want of a horse the rider was lost.
For want of a rider the battle was lost.
For want of a battle the kingdom was lost.
And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.

I have no idea what to do and my current visa waiver for the UK expires in 10 days.

How do you define despair?